Activities, Interests, Lifestyle, Series

Reflections: Integrity

A birthday is usually the most important day in one’s life. The 6-week journey and build up to Noloyiso’s Birthday was such an enjoyable and interesting read.

Life is meant to be celebrated and every day is a journey. On 8 June 2019, my friend celebrated her 34th birthday and her blog post on this auspicious day sparked my interest. This year, Noloyiso has developed so much. She has become a young lady who realised that “adulting ” is a tough job!

“Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same things!” This line is something that I try to live by all the time. The word is INTEGRITY.

I believe that this is a characteristic that sticks with one ’till the end of time! It is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. In this day and age, integrity is the most difficult quality to maintain.

The society we live in questions and tests our integrity all the time. We are faced with moral dilemmas every day. In South Africa, even our leaders don’t help in showing us that uprighteous living is so important. Our children think it is ok to cheat, to bribe or bully other learners for homework, money, etc. I am a teacher and my integrity is always in limbo. However, it is something I have to stick to all the time, no matter how difficult.

Sometimes I almost feel hypocritical. What I say at school is so different than what happens at home. I sometimes insist and give good advice to learners at school. I ask them to behave appropriately, have 8 hrs of sleep, complete homework on Friday and eat nutritious meals. My biological children don’t listen to these instructions. Homework is done on a Sunday night, 2 hrs of sleep on a Friday and Saturday is sufficient because of Fortnite or YouTube or movies. Pizza and burgers are meals that go down well too. My integrity, even though so small in these instances, is called into question.

However, I have realised in all of this that as long as moral principles are maintained in being good and doing good, then that is all that matters. Living your best life definitely means that doing what is right will be remembered to the end of time.

Viloshini is a Johannesburg based Drama teacher who loves reading, listening to music and living every day with positivity and laughter.

Activities, Guest Blogging, Interests, Series, Uncategorized

Reflections: Friendship

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Friendships can be a fickle thing. As humans, we thrive on social connections. Unfortunately, not all friendships are as strong as we’d hope them to be. Some of us spend years cultivating that special bond we should share with our friends. Others meet on a whim and become lifelong buddies. I often find myself feeling like that friend you only talk to when you need something, as painful as it is to admit. I spend so much time giving and being there for my “friends” and more often than not, that’s all I am. I grew up in a semi large family, most of which I do not know and those I do know, saying that we aren’t that close. As a result, I tend to treat my friends like family yet I always find myself asking if this person is really in it for the love of friendship, or for what they stand to gain from having me as a friend.

I am not a confrontational being which often means when problems arise in said friendship; I usually don’t address it, this often leaves me feeling taken advantage of and or resentful that I don’t speak up more.

In the 21st century, loyalty is rare and good friendships even more so. As such, I always ask myself what we even know about the meaning of real friendship! And how does one break the barrier of continuously choosing the wrong friends, when no is really interested in keeping that bond sacred?

Tamiqua Martin is fresh outa high school! She loves photography, writing, reading and psychology. She’s an easy going adventurer whose world is her oyster!

Interests, Lifestyle, Series, Soul Stuff

Reflections: Babies or No Babies


The choice not to procreate is rarely discussed. Maybe it is because most people are so sure that they want children. For most, procreating is a natural part of life and it wouldn’t make sense not to want kids.

I have a similar view on motherhood and have chosen not to have children for now. Much like Noloyiso’s views on Baby Mama, I am open to having children but also realise that this may not be the natural path for my life.

My personal view is that one should plan accordingly before making the decision to have kids. This begins with the person you procreate with down to having the resources to raise a child. Ask any parent and none of them will tell you that parenthood is easy. It is easily the most difficult yet rewarding thing that you will probably do in your life.

People and society need to remember that we are all allowed the choice of motherhood but, also, not to choose it. I’m sure all the “when are you having a baby questions” are coming from a good place however, people need to learn to exercise caution with these questions. They also need to refrain from asking these questions when they are not close to that man or woman.

Personally, I will always like to look back on this post when I reflect on my decision not to have kids in my 20s. Per the article, I am broody but reserve my right to have children only when I am ready to do so.

In 2020, may all women make decisions that are right for them!