Activities, Interests, Lifestyle, Love & War, my adventures

3 Things I Hate About Adulting

I think back to when I was a teenager. My mom and I would talk about what kind of adult I would be: where I would live, how many kids I’d have etc. I imagine that poor woman laughed at all my musings because she knew, as all adults know, how complicated adult life can actually get. I’ve been thinking lately about adjusting and how life turned out completely differently to how I expected. Here are 3 adulting pet peeves I’ve picked up along the way.

The Errands

My biggest accomplishments over weekends usually involve some kind of adult errand that I couldn’t get to during the week! Of course, I do some adult fun stuff too but the fun: responsibility ratio is definitely 2:4. This past midterm break was the first break that I felt like I didn’t actually spend resting because of the errands I had to run ( to be fair, I had postponed the one for a year). I can’t remember the last time I woke up on a Saturday or holiday and had nowhere to be and nothing that had to be done that day. Adulting comes with so many expectations and people you “should not” disappoint. Speaking of things that should be:

The Suppose To Bes

I think adults all live vicariously through each other, mostly because of what they hoped to and didn’t get to accomplish. Adults look at your life and tell you you should be travelling more, buying property or making babies. In my 20s, it was OK that I was childless and unattached but now, in my 30s, adults who walk ahead of me in adulthood scratch their heads and say, “yeah, it’s time now”.

I think it’s all projections of where they are or where they wish they were. I have family members who had kids “late” and worry that I will struggle to raise my future kids if I wait any longer. My friend jokingly told me that a plus one would be assigned to me if I did not bring one to his wedding at the end of March. I get it and I do it too: I edit people’s lives as a way of rectifying or reliving my own life. Sometimes I see the potential mistakes those that walk behind me are making and I try to lead in the right direction, but the truth is, nobody actually asked me for advice and I don’t know that they may actually be making better decisions than I ever made at their age. It’s also a lot of pressure for the person in the shoes, because you understand the good things about your life and you also understand the yearnings for that which you don’t have yet. Most importantly, you can work through your feelings about it all the older you get. While advice is needed sometimes, it’s also ok to understand that one’s life doesn’t need to look like any of the should bes in order to be a good life.

The Decisions

Sometimes I wish someone would step into my life and actually make the decisions I am too afraid to make. I wish they would make all the difficult decisions for me so I dont have to deal with the stress of it all. Adult decisions are scary. What if you make the wrong financial decision and end up in debt? What if you play it safe and take no risks resulting in a life void of adventure? What if you go on that adventure and something bad happens?! I’m hyperventilating at all the possibilities!

Don’t panic, though! Adulting can be a bit of a balancing act, that’s for sure, but it can be a lot of fun too. I’ve learned that it’s ok to let go sometimes and have a little fun. I’ve learned that some things are for you, are still coming for you or will not come, and that’s OK. Sometimes it’s ok to take the day off for yourself and pick it all back up the next day. It’s really not the end of the world. In the adult world, you have to take the good in with the bad. Things have a strange way of working themselves out for your good in the end.

So clearly I don’t have any answers for you. There is no epiphany about how to make a good life to yourself. Sift through the advice, take in what you want and throw out the rest and you may just survive the world of adults more or less in one piece.

am writing, Love & War, Ramblings

Control

Hey everyone! It’s good to have you back😊 I had a bit of drama yesterday but I’m begining to bounce back a little bit, I’ll tell you all about it in a minute!

I finally finished this gem in the wee hours of this morning! If you haven’t yet, you should really get your hands on this beauty! I’m definitely planning to read it again!

Back to my drama! The past few weeks have been very very strange. I haven’t been sleeping very well. I go to bed at a decent hour and without the disturbing noise of the TV. But without fail, every morning, around 4am, I’m up. Wide awake. I’ve finally resorted to reading and catching up on marking until I fall back asleep. On other nights, I spend the time in prayer and meditation; there is so much to pray about, guys!

I’ve also been putting my body through a lot of strain in the gym. My shins have been hurting and so have my knees from all the extra work I’ve been putting in. Everyone around me has been telling me to take it easy, rest and pick it back up – I haven’t listened and yesterday, I caught a stomach bug! Well, it wasn’t that bad, but my plan to go for a run in the morning and gym later on in the day as well as put in some marking in between was shot to hell! My body caved and demanded the rest I was refusing it.

Even as I proofread this, I feel mildy overwhelmed! I try to do too much and I’m not sure what I’m trying to prove, but my lesson here is very clear: I need to give up control: over my body, my work, the people in my life, everything! I started this year with the intention to enjoy my life the way it is and it’s time to go with the flow, listen to my body and my mind and just relax a little bit.

So share with me! What is your life demanding of you right now? I hope you are listening closely! It’s always a pleasure to have you here. Don’t worry, Sunday will be here before you know it 😘

am writing, Love & War, Prose, Ramblings

Forward

Happy Sunday erbody!

How’s the weather in your corner of the world? It’s been raining in Joburg since last night. It’s the perfect weather for staying cooped up in bed with a good book, a stew on the stove while in the arms of a bearded Nubian King! Wow! That escelated so quickly😂

Today I’d like to share what vaguely resembles poetry, but prefer calling prose… I’ve learned this week that moving on and getting over is dependant on me and not always on outside factors. I tend to play victim a great deal of the time to excuse my own holding on…

Anyway! Here you go! Enjoy the read!

So we’ve been sitting here.

Hunched over this mess,

throwing blame back and forth as though in a tennis match.

I’m tired.

Of sitting.

Of wallowing.

Of spewing accusations at you and wiping upthrown bile from my own face.

I’m moving forward.

You’re welcome to move with me.

Or you can stay behind and wallow on your own.

As always, I appreciating your dropping by for my posts! Your support means the world to me! Have a beautiful week! I’ll see you on Wednesday😘

am writing, Nifty Tricks, Ramblings

Discipline

Hello everybody!

What a hectic but rewarding week! I hope yours is going well so far too!

So I started this week off with a plan. Because I knew it was going to be a very demanding week especially workwise, I knew I would need a lot of discipline to get through it! And so my mind was set on being disciplined.

So tonight, I’m gonna share some pointers that helped me to maintain it. Here it is:

Discipine means Determination

No matter what aspect of your life you choose to be discplined in, you’re going to need to be determined in order to stay in it. Your mind will make up all kinds of reasons why you don’t need to go to gym today or why that work assignment can wait for later for you to do. You will need to be stubborn and force yourself to do it anyway. Make up your mind, don’t think about it; just start. Simple.

Stay calm

It’s important not to panic when obsticles come your way. You have a plan in place stick to it and don’t let the curveballs get you down, ok?

Take time to do your own thing

You are not a machine! You are allowed to get tired and you are allowed to rest. Rest, not stop. After regrouping, get back up and get on with it!

Self-improvement is a lot of work but it’s worth it because it is the one good thing you can do for yourself. You matter and you are worth every effort you put in! Don’t you forget it!

Ok, I’m done yodaring, lol. Thank you for popping in and have a beautiful remaining week😊 I’ll see you on Sunday!

am writing, Love & War, Prose, Ramblings, Soul Stuff, Teacher Problems, Uncategorized

Invigilation

Invigilation is a slow game of Pacman. There are, however, no winners;

Just teachers entrenched in those aisle

Picking up dropped pencils and adjusting facedown student cards- bored out of their minds

Knowing fully well that their only escape is a quiet classroom and a pile waiting for that red tick- Or red cross.

Students, stuck in their seats filling pages and pages with dates and sums and reasons in hopes that they will will be rewarded. Sometimes merely waiting for the declaration: “Pens down!”

Indeed, this game of Pacman holds us all hostage!